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Home » Publications » Free Presbyterian Magazine » 1919 » December 1919 » EXTRACTS FROM DIARY

EXTRACTS FROM DIARY

Some papers were discovered after Mrs. Humphrey’s death, which show the spiritual exercises of her mind, and the warm living breath of love to Christ that pulsated within her, along with a measure of the grace of assurance that many true Christians do not attain to. They are dated a good many years back. We subjoin a few extracts:—

“October 25th, 1885.—’Trust ye in the Lord forever; for in the Lord Jehovah is everlasting strength.’ He has done wonderful things for me. Blessed be His name: He is the hearer and the answerer of prayer. O that I could trust Him more fully! 25th.—O how sweet to sit under His shadow! Partook of the Sacrament. O what love the Father hath bestowed on us to give His beloved Son to die for us! Blessed Jesus, whom have I in heaven but Thee, and there is none on earth I desire as I desire Thee? O for more love to Jesus! It must come from Thee, loving Saviour; we are not able of ourselves to do any good thing, not even one good thought. Thou shalt present us faultless before the Father’s face.

“November 5th.—Thou blessed Rock of ages, I am hiding in Thee, and finding shelter there. I cannot flee from my evil self. I find such depths of corruption in me that I see plainly that nothing short of the new heart will do. ‘Create in me a clean heart, and renew a right spirit within me.’ But, loving Saviour, I am trusting in Thee for time and eternity. 25th.—Hitherto the Lord hath helped me. Goodness and mercy have followed all the days of my life. What an ungrateful wretch am I, and God so strangely kind! O for a heart to love and praise Thee, heavenly Father! Make me wise to know Thee. I am so blind and ignorant. Open Thou the eyes of my understanding; teach me by Thy Holy Spirit. I am unworthy of the least of Thy mercy, but look on me in the face of Jesus Christ. 27th.—He is kept in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Thee, because He trusteth in Thee. Draw me nearer, Lord, now to Thee. Wash me, and cleanse me in the blood for Thine own name’s sake, and the glory shall be Thine.

“December 9th.—I thank Thee for Thy goodness and long-suffering patience, loving Father. Reveal Thy Son in my heart. Give me understanding in all things. Quicken Thou me, and give me grace to rise above this world and the things that will vanish. Draw me nearer unto Thyself, blessed Saviour, and grant me the indwelling of Thy Holy Spirit; and the glory shall be Thine now and evermore. 14th.—Lord, help me to lay aside all malice, and the sin which does so easily beset me, and to look unto Jesus in every time of trouble. O for grace to fix my eye constantly on Him in joy as well as in sorrow. Loving Jesus, Thou must fix my eye on Thee, and keep it so. Take me as I am, for Thine own name’s sake.

“January 14th, 1886.—Revive Thy work in my heart, O my Father, and take away this deadness and coldness. Forgive me the sin of distrusting Thee. Blessed Jesus, dwell Thou in my heart, and subdue all iniquity. O for a heart to praise Thee for Thy goodness and long-suffering patience towards me, a sinful creature. Do Thou prepare my heart to hold communion with Thee at Thy table in the Church below. Manifest Thyself to my soul, and draw me nearer than I have ever been before. Make me wise to discern Thy body. Thou art the bread of life. Do Thou enable me to feed on Thee. Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Take me as I am, and make me what I ought to be, for Thine own name’s sake. And the glory shall be Thine.

“February 20th.—Sorely tempted with the enemy of my soul, but found great relief in waiting on Thee in Thy house of prayer. I find Jesus a very present help in every time of need. I desire to be growing more like unto Thee. Thou art able to make me like unto Thee. I find I am very far from it now. Empty me of myself that Thou mayest fill me out of Thy own fulness. O to be nothing, only to lie at Thy feet, a broken empty vessel for the Master’s use made meet, and the glory shall be Thine.

“March 21st.—Dr. MacLachlan entered into his rest this morning. It is a solemn warning to us. Be ye also ready. But, dear Jesus, it is Thou Thyself that must prepare us. No preparation can we make. Our best resolves we only break; then save us for Thine own name’s sake. Take us as we are. Oh, I do rejoice to think that Thou hast the keys of death, hell, and heaven. Thouwert dead and art alive again, and wilt live for evermore. And because Thou livest, blessed Saviour, we need not fear. I have no other trust but Thee.”

These are the sweet breathings of faith and hope and love on the part of a living soul, cleaving closely to the Lord. May He bless the record to our readers!

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