BY THE REV. JOHN ROBERTSON, GREENOCK.
MANY of the excellent ones of the earth pass through this world almost unknown, either in consequence of the afflictions they endure, or through their retiring disposition. One of the most godly women ever known to the writer, was almost wholly confined to bed for the long period of fully forty years. After a short married life, her husband and only child were removed by death, and she discovered, with regret, that he had left behind him a number of unpaid debts. Feeling a moral obligation lying upon her to discharge these, she entered into service, and remained at this employment until she had paid them all. But in the inscrutable wisdom of the Most High, further trials awaited her, as she was soon after entirely laid aside by an internal and incurable complaint, from which she suffered more or less for the rest of her life. For a long part of her time on earth she was, in addition to her inward trouble, quite blind, and thus wholly dependent on the gifts which were gladly bestowed upon her by the friends whom the righteous Lord raised up to attend to her wants. Her remarkably pious character drew around her many who valued divine things and felt that they were benefited by her conversation, and prudent counsels, for she was one deeply taught of God, and knew more of the wiles of Satan than most. Many of her striking sayings are now lost, but one or two that are recalled may be quoted. Referring to the words, “They have no changes, therefore they fear not God,” she remarked, “That is not like me, for I have many changes in a day.” Again, when speaking of the love of Christ, and of the soul’s love to Him, she said, “If I had a thousand hearts I would give them all to Him.” Shortly before her death, she expressed a wish that some Free Church Ministers, whom she named, might see how a Christian could die. On another occasion, she remarked that the Lord had taken her from the beginning of Genesis to the end of Revelation, and opened up to her such a glory as she was unable to express. Her name was Martha Fraser, and she was an attached member of the Rev. Jonathan R. Anderson’s Congregation of John Knox Church, Bedford Street, Glasgow. As long as he remained in that Congregation, she regularly gave a little of what she received to the Sustentation Fund, so that it may be said of her as of the Macedonian Church, “That in a great trial of affliction the abundance of her joy, and her deep poverty, abounded unto the riches of her liberality.” As the memory of the just is blessed, it is pleasant to have this opportunity of bearing a very imperfect testimony to one, who it cannot be
doubted, “walked worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God!”
The subject of the following brief sketch was a type of the other class. Though not robust she appears to have enjoyed tolerably fair health most of her life, but was naturally of a very reserved disposition. On this account she did not come much before the public, and was not intimately known except to her more immediate friends. Miss Jane Moody was born in Paisley on the 29th of August, 1803. She was the eldest daughter of Andrew Moody of Muirshiel, who was long a leading citizen of that town, and a sister of the late Rev. Dr. Moody Stuart of Edinburgh. She was of a quiet, retiring nature, and never allowed herself to speak unguardedly, so that by her retiring disposition she was not readily known. No one, however, could be long in her company without recognising that “she walked in the light of the world to come,” and as under the eyes of Him before whom all things are naked and open. She took a deep interest in the cause of God in the world, and evidently made it a matter of much prayer in secret. She devoted herself in a quiet way in endeavouring to do good in the locality in which she lived, visiting among rich and poor, and made it a practice to pray with her friends before leaving them. For many years she had a meeting for prayer in her house once a week, which was conducted by a minister or other suitable person. The words of the Apostle James might be fitly applied to her, “If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body.” She was so guarded in her remarks that one might have lived with her long without noticing anything inconsistent with her Christian profession. She was by no means easily satisfied with what she heard from the pulpit, and did not hesitate to express her dissatisfaction when the preacher did not come up to what she regarded as essential in the declaration of the grace of God. Little has been left by her in the shape of a diary, from which a suitable narrative of her life could be drawn up. Still, the little that remains gives evidence of her having been instructed in the things of the Kingdom and much taught of the Holy Spirit, and that at times she enjoyed peculiar nearness to her Redeemer. Though she did not shine in the world, her record, it may well be believed, is on high, and the good she wrought in her own quiet way will be revealed in the Lord’s own time. We subjoin what has come to light of her brief diary, in the hope that her gracious experiences may stimulate others of the Lord’s people to press forward towards the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus, and thus advance His glory in the good of His Church on earth.
Leading up to what she has left on record, it may be stated that her father died in the year 1826, soon to be followed by his two eldest sons, so that she became in this way the head of the
family. What was the exact time, or the instrumental cause, of her being awakened to a sense of her state as a sinner before God is unknown, but from a remark in the earliest piece of her diary that has been made public it would appear that that all important crisis in her life took place not long before 1823, for she writes in July of that year, “I have finished my self-examination in what is required in the first commandment, with all the particulars mentioned in the Confession of Faith, and have written down the result of each without making any remark. I trust that God will enable me to examine myself impartially, although I have great fear always about deceiving myself. I have so little of the grace of humility, and am so prone to think well of my own actions, the best of which are always mixed with something impure. I have the prospect of sitting down next Lord’s day to commemorate the blessed Redeemer. Oh that I may be prepared for this solemn service! Although I felt deeply impressed last time, often—very often since then—I have acted inconsistently; but if I know myself at all, I do think I am growing in love to God; I do think I am more careful not to bring dishonour on the cause of God. If there is any growing conformity to God, I desire to give Him all the praise, knowing that I can do no good thing of myself, and that without His blessing all my endeavours would be fruitless.” After sitting down at the Lord’s table the following Sabbath, she writes, “I trust that I have not been an unworthy communicant. I did not feel as if the Lord said, ‘Stand back;’ but my spiritual feelings were, as they always are, so dead that I had not clear views of my state. I had great doubts of myself, and I prayed to God that He would indeed give me an evidence within myself that I was a worthy partaker. Now I feel much happier, I trust this does not proceed from carelessness, or from viewing sin as light. In the examination of myself, previous to engaging in this solemn service, I did indeed see that if God were to accept of me, it could be for no righteousness of my own; but my only hope was in Christ’s righteousness. Now, O Lord, do thou enable me to devote myself steadily to Thy service, and may the religion which I profess have an influence over all my thoughts and actions, and may I be kept from doing anything that will bring dishonour on the cause of religion.” She had many fears notwithstanding these exercises of soul that they did not give solid evidence of her having passed through that saving change, without which no one can enter the kingdom of heaven; but this is not an unusual experience in the case of those who are concerned about the salvation of their souls. In the month of September of that year, she heard two sermons from Mr. Marshall of the Tolbooth Church, Edinburgh. The subjects of the discourses were, “How long halt ye between two opinions?” and “I must work the works of Him that sent me while it is called to-day.” From these discourses she appears to have derived benefit. Conversing that afternoon on the subject of faith and
good works, she remarks, “I think that although faith is the ground of our justification before God, perhaps those who are denominated evangelical attend too little to the checking of their passions, and this is, I dare say, the case with myself, although it would be far from me to think that we can be justified by our works, or that our works, even the very best of them, can have any merit.”
Again, she writes, “Yesterday I was much distressed on account of want of fervour in my morning prayer; it took quite away my composure of mind; surely it is a great insult to draw near to God, and profess to worship Him, while our hearts are far from Him. In examining myself, I think that there is a progress in my love toward God, but that this love has not been enough mixed in all my actions; on many occasions when my temper has been getting the better of me, I have not taken much pains to subdue it; indeed, I have often thought it too trifling to pay much attention to.” In examining herself previous to a Communion season, she says that she has a much deeper sense of her sinfulness than she used to have, and considers that this is an evidence of grace, and that another evidence was, that she loved the company of God’s people, and that she looked forward to the Sabbath, and especially to a Communion Sabbath, with great delight. She mentions that she found it of great consequence to arrange beforehand the subjects for her meditations at the table of the Lord, so as to be free from distractions during the ordinance. Another evidence which she takes as an evidence of her being the Lord’s is, “I do feel a much more tender concern for the glory of God in many ways.” In this way the Lord seems to have been preparing her for receiving a much larger measure of grace and clearer views of her acceptance by Him, for there is the following entry at the end of 1825:—”Have enjoyed for two days an extreme peace of mind and joy, which I would believe an increasing evidence (of being Christ’s). God alone could communicate such joy in holy meditation and prayer;” and two days later, “God has given me now no remaining doubt of my being one of His adopted children. The Lord, I am persuaded, has long been drawing me to Himself. It has long been my prayer that I might have the witness within myself; but, at the same time, that I might not deceive myself, I prayed that I might rather be kept longer in doubt than be deceiving myself with the thought of peace when there is no peace.”
Her next entry is dated 21st July, 1830, in which she gives a résumé of her spiritual state, saying, “After the death of my father and two eldest brothers, our circumstances requiring it, I resolved to take the situation of governess, and it was about this time about two years ago that God began to show me the exceeding hardness of my heart. I felt an uncommon backwardness to pray, and in spite of all my endeavours could not continue in it. I never fully asked a blessing on my going to Edinburgh; complaining of my state of
mind to others, besought them to do it for me. After leaving home, my occupations kept my mind busy during the day, but at night I often sat up for hours endeavouring to read and pray, but always in vain. I could get no access to God. Although I could give no proper account of it, either to myself or to others, I became extremely unhappy about religion. My body not being in a good state of health, and my mind miserable, the one acting on the other and reacting, I came home for six weeks, and my state was truly wretched; sunk into the very lowest spirits, almost deprived of ideas, and saying sometimes that I believed I was going to hell, and that nothing could stop it. Often I walked up and down the room, or knelt down, just asking God to have mercy on my soul for Christ’s sake; but alas, instead of giving myself up to seek the favour of God, I felt the utmost disinclination to read a religious book, and not knowing what to do with myself, I read a novel, not caring, however, about it, or any other amusement, any further than as it took me off myself, which it never did. I was terrified when alone, having no trust in God. My state of mind and health were not at all such as to warrant my return to my charge; but my friends, understanding nothing of my real state, wished it, believing it to be the very best thing that I should be kept from myself. God Himself had overruled all these events for His own glory, and the good of my soul, in my first going to Edinburgh, that, being taken away from religious friends, I might be brought to a knowledge of my own sin and weakness, and next, that I might learn the way to Christ.
“After my return to Edinburgh, we soon went to Musselburgh, where I heard no Gospel preaching. This was very trying to me. Here I had more time to read and think; and, having no acquaintances, I was more alone. I had often tried to have peace by having complacency in myself, thinking that through time all would be with me as in former days. There was no awakening sermon or conversation that aroused me. Only once a lady said to me that our unhappiness was from self seeking, which gave me something to think of. Excepting this, the Lord alone, without the use of instruments, by His providences, by His Spirit, and His Word, brought me to think deeply of my lost state. Whilst at Musselburgh, God said to my soul, ‘Except ye be born again, ye cannot enter into the kingdom of heaven.’ I tried to think I was born again. I recalled every season of my life, and endeavoured to say of it, ‘There was a change then.’ I gave myself the space of one, two, or six years, but I could not say there was a change. I then began to say that if there was, I could not know it but from my evidences, and I brought these forward; but all would not do; I had no peace of mind; all was darkness and misery. Continuing in this state of mind, I resolved to break the subject to some one who might be useful to me; for hitherto no one was of any service to me. Many who pass for true Christians understand nothing of vital religion; and a person under
conviction meets but few to help on. How many, alas! perish in this way, either by returning to the world, or becoming satisfied with their duties instead of with Christ, or by utter despair. God at this time directed me to Mr. Marshall’s family. Meeting with Miss J. Marshall alone, I told her the whole; that I was miserable, and that I dreaded, although at present under conviction, I should never be converted, as many went no further than conviction. I told her that my mind was very atheistical, and this was not from hearing or reading anything on the subject. Twice I came to the conclusion that God was a spirit of malevolence. Oh, why did he not cut me down at that moment? I have reason to be grateful that I did not express my atheistical feelings (surely the devil was raging within me). Often I felt inclined to speak out these, but God, by His grace, restrained me. I told her that I felt no trust in God at all; that the law on the one hand, was standing up against me terrifically; and the Saviour I saw also, but I could not appropriate Him. I told her that in the letters I received, I was advised to keep up my spirits, because my dulness would do harm to religion amongst others. I said that I was looking back to my evidences, and taking comfort from them, that all would again be well with me. Miss J. M. understood my state at once, from her own experience, and said to me, ‘Oh, do not look back; it will never do. Come to the cross of Christ as the vilest of the vile.’ I said, too, that I had not known so much of the preciousness of the Saviour during my whole life as I had done for the three last weeks. So she comforted me by saying that she believed, from my being led to read much of the Bible (for I could not be happy two hours without reading it), and from my being led so much to the Saviour, that they were not the common convictions of nature, but that they were of the Holy Spirit, and that God would perfect the work.
“God showed me that I must be humbled low as the thief on the cross, as the chief of sinners. I had brought forward my evidences again and again, but now God showed me that I must part with them all. Of my love for ordinances, of my joy in religion, of my comfort in affliction, of my consistency of character, and wish to do good, God said to my soul, of one and all of them, that they were refuges of lies. My feelings were those of horror; these were my Saviour on which I leaned; I now had no stay. But even at this time God visited my soul with some very comfortable passages of Scripture, which often drew tears of gratitude from my eyes, such as ‘blotting out the handwriting of ordinances which was against us,’ etc., and my frequent prayer was that He would never take from me the sight of a Saviour when He was giving me deep views of sin. Whilst at Musselburgh, I had begun to make much use of the name of Christ in my prayers, but at that time knew nothing more of the way of salvation than a heathen, and even at this time knew little of it. I felt myself quite without any
prop. Often I wished even for an earthly one; but God in mercy did not give me my wish, as He had designed that Christ Jesus, the Son of His love, was to be the only anchor of my soul. Mr. Marshall spoke to me of the danger of working out my own righteousness, and then taking Christ to make up the rest, and showed that although I should arrive at the attainments of St. Paul I could not possibly be saved on that ground; Christ must be all my righteousness. As to books, he advised the Bible almost exclusively. I also read and profited by Romaine on Faith, and Bunyan’s Heart’s Ease in Heart trouble.
“I felt afraid of letting the subject of religion leave my mind a minute, in case the memory of God and the desire to be religious should be for ever erased. I have for weeks together felt myself as sensibly under the bondage of Satan as I could feel myself confined in a room if locked in. The few minutes in which I was convinced and without doubt that I was a sinner and ready for hell were awful; I wished the earth could open to receive me. I never felt sure when I went to bed at night that I would not awake in hell. How awful are the horrors of an awakened conscience!
“God showed me at this time something of the nature of true grace in a dream I had. In my dream I found myself very unhappy, being surrounded by temptations, and I asked God to give me grace to ensure me against gross sins, but the prayer was not answered. I then asked grace to secure me for a little while against all temptations, that I might have some quiet of mind. This was also denied, so I saw that I must be content as a beggar to live on God from one moment to another, and to have nothing in myself. So I got some idea of the nature of grace, which was very useful to me. Thus did I go on much in despair, but learning one lesson after another during the whole winter. Many of them were very painful, but I was now more desirous of being taught by the Holy Spirit than of anything else. In spring I saw that I was bringing a price in my hand, the price being my own holiness and my own doings, so I entreated the Lord to wrench it out of my hand, to humble me, and to make me poor and needy. I saw there was no hope in myself, but I could not believe, although I saw it was the only way in which I could be saved; I had many doubts about trusting myself wholly in the hands of Christ. But God, who is rich in mercy, enabled me to believe on Christ Jesus, and leaving everything in myself, to rest on Him alone for salvation. What a joyful hope is Christ Jesus, the Rock of Ages! What am I, that God should thus be mindful of me! May God, by His grace, enable me to live as a new creature in Christ Jesus, and oh, may I not dishonour His holy name!”
Miss Moody’s diary closes here, but there are two or three lines appended to it in her own hand, in pencil, which partly explain some of the statements. “I often felt that I was beginning to see the light, as the blind man who saw men as trees walking. The
burden of sin I, for long, felt to be taken away, but never could be satisfied till I knew Him by whom it was taken away.” From this time forward she seems to have gone on “growing in grace and in the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ,” but no further record of her experience is given by her until the month of August, 1857, when she writes: “Have been thinking that I ought to have some little memoranda of the Lord’s remarkable dealings with my own soul, and in connection with His people. I may still remember some of the leading features, and may be glad of it afterwards to refer to. I was getting much teaching myself—much feeling of my own sin and of sin around—and at the Communion in March, 1855, got so much that I felt it could not be for myself alone. From that time the people were laid upon me in a remarkable way”—(the Free Church congregation of Bothwell, of which she was a member). She mentions having profited much at this time by the temporary ministration in the Bothwell Church of the Rev. John Tait of Dumbarton, and refers to a circumstance in connection with a sermon she had heard from Mr. Arnot (St. Peter’s, Glasgow). “I remember of hearing Mr. Arnot appeal to his congregation, and asking if any would arise for the people—if one would do it? It did not take hold of me at the time, except to think of it and remember that such a thing might be. Then I came to know what it was by experience. I sometimes wondered if it was impious, but I seemed to myself to be bearing about with me the whole sins of the people, and had large experience of what it was to have fellowship with Christ in His sufferings. But all this time, and all along, there was the most extraordinary presence of God. My whole being was filled with Him. I often said to myself, has God ever manifested Himself so much to any other? I never knew that He did; but such a weight of sorrow! I was often obliged to go to my room, and, falling down before Him, had nothing to say but over and over again, ‘O Lord, thy hand is heavy, very heavy.’ My head literally became a fountain of tears—unlike me. Many a time I said to the Lord that if He withdrew, I could not live. Sin was seen, and felt by me as it had never been before. Much confession for the people, and great sorrow on their account—great destitution. An extraordinary ministry of angels; surrounded by them; they were so near I sometimes thought I should have heard their sweet song. Felt the great dignity of being a child of God. Any of the people that cared for these things seemed to get great good from this broken state, but I had far more to do with God that summer than with the people. There came to be more petition and less confession. I could carry the people into the very bosom of Christ. Lived so much in heaven, that for a time felt that it would not be new to me to go there. This not desirable; heaven is ever new and fresh. The love that is between Christ and my soul is intense. I say sometimes, would He not rather have me altogether with
Himself than be coming so much to me? I have thought sometimes I would not be happy even in heaven unless I was near Christ. I think now I shall be very near, because if He so loves as to be so much and so close to me here, He would not put me further away there. It seems now as if He was between me and every creature and every thing.
“November 8th, 1858.—Had the largest petition to bring to the communion table yesterday that I ever had—for ‘the world,’ that ‘all the ends of the world might remember and turn to the Lord.’ (Ps. xxii. 27.) Felt that this petition was far too heavy for myself to carry, but knew that Jesus would help to bear the weight of it when He had given it, and so He did. It was just ask, over and over, and over again, not only the half but the whole, until I was obliged to commit it to the Holy Spirit that He might do it for me. Not only Christ near but the ministering spirits. Did formerly know something of what it was to enter into fellowship with Christ in His sufferings, but could scarcely conceive what it would be when it was for ‘the world.’ When it was so awful even for a portion, oh! what must it have been for ‘all the ends of the earth!’ was allowed more particular and private petitions after.”
Her diary continues:—”The Lord has been most graciously giving a return of health and strength, confirming it more, so that there is ability for more continued work; and most graciously choosing a place and house for me. I have reason to believe that He has given me this house, and so He will order all and give all that is right and good regarding it. He gives kind friends, so that arrangements are made pleasant and easy. It seems almost a surprise to myself that while I am vigorous in doing what is necessary about furniture, and do it pleasantly, my heart is so little in the world. I would just feel ready to go at any time to be for ever with Himself, but I would also seek to feel that it is an honour to be permitted and used for any of His work here. May my connection with this place be blessed, and may this place be a birthplace for souls? It is a great cause of praise that the furnishing and getting my house in order did not come between my soul and God.” Later she once more writes: “After all, this is not my home. I feel far more at home in my Father’s house in heaven, and there is much greater reality and closeness in converse with Him than with any human being, even the dearest and most intimate. My home is in the bosom of my heavenly Father; He will order all my lot here. Psalm xxxvii. 3-4.”
Thus closes the record which this excellent person has left of herself, and it will be acknowledged by all, that we have in her brief diary some very valuable Christian experience which is well fitted to afford instruction to those who are striving to enter into the kingdom of heaven by the straight and narrow way. Her experience gives warning of the danger of resting in anything short of an interest in the Lord Jesus: that mere convictions are not enough; that they are useful only so far as they break the
creature off from all confidence in his own righteousness, and lead him to place all his hope in the Saviour. It was of a very clear and distinct character, and gives good evidence of having been the effectual work of the Holy Spirit. Her jealousy over her motives, as well as her actions, is very marked. Her delight in the exercises of the Sabbath, and especially of Communion Sabbaths; her love to God Himself, and her amazement that He should have thought of one so unworthy as she felt herself to be is most noticeable. Her convictions of sin were exceedingly deep, though she was one who exhibited a most unblemished life and conversation to all who knew her. It is thus apparent that she realised that the word of God is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart, and that while the world takes notice only of outward and gross sins, those who are taught by the Spirit of the Lord see how much corruption there is even in a vain thought, and that there is unspeakable dishonour done to the Most High by the least departure from the requirements of His holy, just, and good law. God is sovereign in the bestowal of His grace, and all need not look to have the same experience of nearness to Him she had, nor ought any to judge hastily that they do not possess any because they do not come up to her standard, yet surely the record she has given of her experience ought to stimulate all to strive the more earnestly to grow in grace, and in the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.
Useful Booklets.—The Testimony Publishing Company, Chicago, through the liberality of two Christian laymen, are publishing a series of booklets containing papers by prominent theologians and laymen in defence of some of the great doctrines of the faith. These booklets are issued under the general title of The Fundamentals, and in the two issues before us contain such papers—”The Virgin Birth of Christ,” by Professor Orr; “The Deity of Christ,” by Prof. Warfield; “History of the Higher Criticism,” by Canon Hague; “The Testimony of the Monuments to the Truth of the Scriptures,” by Prof. Wright; “The Recent Testimony of Archaeology to the Scriptures,” by Dr. Kyle; “Fallacies of the Higher Criticism,” by Dr. Johnson; “Christ and Criticism,” by Sir Robert Anderson. Some of these papers are decidedly able defences of the truths dealt with. There is a powerful exposure of Modern Philosophy by Philip Mauro, New York. The condition of matters revealed by Mr. Mauro is truly disconcerting, and he certainly has preached a powerful sermon on the words of the Apostle which he has chosen as his text: “Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit.” These booklets are issued post free to all ministers and theological students in the English-speaking world. A post card addressed to “The Testimony Publishing Company, 808 La Salle Avenue, Chicago, Illinois, U.S.A.,” will be sufficient to bring them to all those who come under the above category.