BY THE LATE REV. FRANCIS M’BEAN, FREE CHURCH,
FORT-AUGUSTUS.
(Continued from page 110.)
CONVERSATIONS WITH BETSY LINDSAY.
HAVING heard that I delivered a discourse before the Presbytery, she asked on what subject. “The new birth, and the necessity of the new birth.”
“Will you let me hear some of the discourse?” “The whole would weary you; I shall let you hear the conclusion:—
“The convinced sinner, through ignorance, the perversion of his own heart, and the wily temptations of the arch devil, and his misrepresentation of the divine mind, until he is savingly illumined, some idea or other, as a stumbling block, will stand in the way and prevent his cordial closing with Christ for salvation. Again we say that now the blessed and divine Spirit begins to enlighten him in the saving knowledge of Christ and the glorious scheme of salvation. By His blessed Word He leads him to consider the Gospel that bringeth salvation to the guilty and the undone. He begins to be conversant with its call, its invitations, its offers, and the blessed promises it contains. He examines, compares, and reflects; he is led to view—even over his sins and sinfulness, as ‘mountains of Bether’ or separation—the Lamb of God on the Cross and in the midst of the throne; and as he begins to be conversant with these, he feels—it may be gradually or more suddenly—a powerful persuasion gaining upon his mind, begetting saving faith in Him, and confidence to cast himself and all his sins upon the Lord Jesus Christ. His burden begins to lighten; his poor, oppressed, and broken heart begins to beat and to take courage. Thus is saving faith begotten in the soul; and faith invariably begets hope, and both beget love. But a little more particularly—
1. He is enlightened to understand the covenant of grace.
He examines and sees that it is a covenant well ordered in all things and sure (2 Sam. xxv. 5). He sees that in this covenant truth met with mercy, and righteousness and peace mutually embraced each other (Psalm lxxv. 10); that God can be just and yet the justifier of the ungodly (Romans iii. 26); and he conceives that he hears God saying, ‘Deliver from going down to the pit; I have found a ransom’ (Job xxxiii. 24). This covenant now becomes a wonder to him. He views the sins of angels and of men alike in meriting eternal wrath, and he wonders at the love and mercy of God in desiring the salvation of sinners, and at the wisdom of God in the arrangement of the covenant and scheme of redemption.
2. Christ Jesus, who of sovereign mercy and love entered into this covenant as surety and ransom, becomes wonderful in his sight and engrosses his whole attention.
Usually His priestly office attracts first, in His having laid down His glorious life a ransom for sin. ‘They shall look upon me, whom they have pierced’ (Zech. xii. 10). In this sacrifice he sees an infinite fulness of merit and virtue sufficient for myriads of worlds with all their sins. Thus he views Him as God manifest in the flesh, and the more he contemplates the more he wonders. He sees the excellency of His prophetic office, in having revealed to man the will of God for salvation; and of His kingly office, to overcome sin, Satan, and death. While he thus views and contemplates, Christ Jesus becomes more and more desirable; his heart expands towards Him, and is made to glow with love and desire to Him. ‘While I mused the fire burned’ (Psalm xxxix. 3). Now he says, ‘He is altogether lovely’ (Cant. v. 16). As he thus contemplates, Christ is begotten in him by faith the hope of glory (Col. i. 27). His heart embraces Him for wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and redemption (1 Cor. i. 30). Peace and reconciliation with God pass into his heart, and is thus brought to a good hope through grace (2 Thess. ii. 16). He surrenders himself to God through Christ in a perpetual covenant which shall not be forgotten (Jer. l. 5); and His statutes become his song in the house of his pilgrimage. ‘In that day thou shalt say, O Lord, I will praise thee: though thou wast angry with me, thine anger is turned away, and thou comfortedst me. Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid: for the Lord Jehovah is my strength and my song; he also is become my salvation’ (Isaiah xii. 1, 2).”
Having read this, she said, “That is food indeed. I know all that.”
“Is that the manner in which saving faith is begotten in the soul?” “It is when the divine Spirit enlightens and applies the promises of Christ to the heart it cannot but believe in Him; and oh, how easy a thing it is then to believe savingly in Christ Jesus! The heart cannot be kept from believing in, receiving, and resting upon Christ for salvation. When the promises were thus carried with power to my mind I found my heart, as it were, going out of itself to Christ; and so easy did I find it to rest altogether and eternally upon Christ and His finished work, that I found it as easy as it was for me to think.”
26th February.—
“Your breathing seems more oppressed to-day than usual.” “Yes, but God has relieved my soul from oppression, and He makes me feel that He is my strength. I have had a precious portion to-day.”
“Well, what is it?” “Ye are complete in him’ (Col. ii. 10). How wonderful, though I have a body of sin and death, yet complete in Christ. Would you, sir, be pleased to read some of the hundred and sixteenth Psalm?” “I shall read the whole if you wish.” “If you please, sir.”
“Well does it become me to charge my soul and say, ‘Return unto thy rest, O my soul, for the Lord hath dealt bountifully with thee.’ He hath indeed dealt bountifully with me; He hath delivered my soul from death, mine eyes from tears, and my feet from falling. He hath put my feet upon the rock, Christ, and established my way.”
“No wonder if you should long to be away and be with Him.” “I long to be away and be with Him, that I may serve Him without sin and love Him without sin; but Job says, ‘All the days of my appointed time will I wait, till my change come’ (Job xiv. 14). The Lord’s time is the best time, and His time is worth the waiting.”
27th February.—
“How are you to-day, Betsy?” “Weak; but God has not withdrawn His gracious presence. God is my strength and my portion. That was a glorious subject you were reading yesterday—the first three chapters of Canticles. I felt, indeed, one verse—’His left hand is under my head, and his right hand doth embrace me’ (Canticles ii. 6). Yesterday afternoon I thought I was just quietly slipping away to my home, and that Scripture was a strength to me—(Isaiah xxvi. 19), ‘Thy dead men shall live; together with my dead body shall they arise. Awake and sing, ye that dwell in dust: for thy dew is as the dew of herbs, and the earth shall cast out the dead.’ I joyed at the certainty of the morning of the resurrection—’the earth shall cast out the dead.’ I thought there were three speaking in that verse—the Father, promising the Son that His men, though dead, should live again: the Son, in consequence of the promise of the Father and His own power to raise them, joying and exultingly saying, as if replying, ‘Together with my dead body shall they arise’—as sure as Himself arose from the dead, that His dead men should rise together with Him: the Holy Ghost, viewing the joyful resurrection awaiting the Church of God, joining and speaking to the dead men of Christ, as it were, on the morning of the resurrection, saying, ‘Awake and sing, ye that dwell in dust: for thy dew is as the dew of herbs.’ Oh, how certain and how glorious is the resurrection of the people of God! My soul joyed at the idea of the earthly house of this tabernacle being dissolved, that I have a building of God—an house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens (2 Cor. v. 1). Oh, what wonderful love of the Father and of the Son in preparing such a house for me, and of the Holy Ghost in fitting me for it!”
“I am wearying you by causing you to speak.” “It fatigues me to-day, being so weak. But if I am able to speak at all, it gives me satisfaction if I could speak to the glory of God.”
28th February.—
“How do you find yourself to-day, Betsy?” “Weak, and oppressed in my breast.”
“How is your mind?” “Comfortable.”
“You do not seem so much inclined to talk as usual “I am.” scarce able, being so weak.”
“Perhaps I had better read some verses to you.” “If you please, sir.”
“Where shall I read?” “The twenty-seventh Psalm. I may with David say, ‘The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?'”
“You can say so for yourself?” “Yes. ‘Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear.’ While my hope is fixed on the Rock of Ages what have I to fear? While I am in Christ what need I fear?”
“What host is that to which David alludes, think you?” “An host of spiritual enemies.”
The oppression in her breast increasing, I said, “You are much distressed to-day, Betsy.” “Yes; but the Lord says to me, ‘Fear not, it is I.'”
“Is that your portion to-day?” “It is.”
“A precious portion it is. How tenderly, watchfully, and seasonably He sends you supplies.” “Yes, sir. Wonderful is His love to me, who has been a rebellious sinner; but He has loved me with a sovereign love. How unsearchable is His love!”
When a brush of the cough, which made her perspire, was over, she said, “If I had not the gracious presence of God now I would be miserable; but He has sent me another promise—’As thy days, so shall thy strength be’ (Deut. xxxiii. 25).”
“As you are so weak we had better leave you to your meditation, and not with strange voices interrupt the voice of Him who is beloved of His spouse, and come to see you again.” “If you please, then, to come again, perhaps I may, in the strength of the Lord, be able to speak more.”
“Do you like that people should visit you, or be left alone to your meditation?” “Oh, I like to see visitors.”
“Whether is it because they afford you comfort or an opportunity of speaking to them of the doings of the Lord?” “Because of both, sir.”
1st March.—
“You are much distressed to-day, Betsy?” “Yes; but ‘I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us’—Rom. viii. 18. It is but a moment, compared to eternal glory; light, compared to an eternal weight of glory. The return of the Sabbath is a great blessing, for though I cannot go to public ordinances, yet I long for the return of the Sabbath, for with it come new comforts and new enjoyments. It reminds me of the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, who on it rose triumphantly and led captivity captive. It is a day of holy rest, an emblem of an eternal Sabbath.”
2nd March.—
Called, and found her jaws had locked about eight the previous evening. My sister asked her to press her hand if her mind was happy, which she did.
4th March.—
Called in the evening, found her jaws had opened about eleven in the forenoon—sixty-three hours—and very weak, but breathing easy.
“I felt sorry that I could not speak to your sister on Monday, but it was the will of the Lord, in His holy providence.”
“Is it not a blessing that you can speak to-day, should there be no other than you can breathe easier?” “Oh yes, sir, if I could but praise His name. I was extremely weak yesterday for the want of sustenance; though I felt no hunger, I felt weak. I feel no hunger when I get a drink of cold water. I wonder how this frail body continues to retain the spirit so long. Were it not the gracious presence of God, and the sweet food in His blessed promises, I would have sunk under my affliction long ago. But His promises make me both reconciled and feel easy and patient under His dispensation. What else is fit to hold up the soul under heavy affliction?”
“True, indeed; as you mentioned the other day, ‘As thy days, so shall thy strength be.’”
“Oh, sir, I had a precious promise yesterday, when so much pained and at the lowest.” “What was it?”
“It is in Isaiah xliii. 2, 3—‘When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. For I am the Lord thy God, the Holy One of Israel, thy Saviour.’ There, sir, is no less than a cluster of promises.”
“Yes, like the cluster of full grapes which Caleb and Joshua carried from the valley of Eshcol.” “Yes, sir, the fruit of Emmanuel’s land, the fruit of the tree of life.”
“What promise had you the day before?” “‘My grace is sufficient for thee’—2 Cor. xii. 9.”
“He is very mindful of you?” “Oh, yes; if I could be so mindful of Him.”
“Well, though there may be wanderings while you are in the body, the day is coming when you shall mind Him without distraction.” “Yes, sir, when I put off a body of sin and death.”
6th March.—
“How farest thou to-day, Betsy?” “Weak, sir. I was sore distressed last night. I feel such pain in my head as if I should soon have my jaws locked again.”
“How is your mind?” “Oh, quite comfortable, sir.”
“How was your mind comfortable and happy? What portion of the hidden manna had you yesterday?” “John xiv. 2—‘In my Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.’”
“And what is this day’s portion?” “The same, sir. I feel assured that He, the Lord Jesus Christ, has prepared a place for me, even for me, a poor sinful worm of the dust; yea, a mansion in His Father’s house. This is a promise much suited to my circumstances to-day.”
“How so?” “I am to part with one who has been a neighbour, a companion for a length of time, and who is dear to me, and one whom I shall not see or hear any more in the flesh, for she is just going to Gibraltar. It is a very trying season to me; but the Lord, by that passage, is assuring me that there is no parting with Him to a distant land.”
“Is your friend apparently on the way to Zion?” “I hope and trust she is.”
“Well, then, the Lord will take care of her; and though you may be absent in body, you will be present in spirit, and meet each other at a throne of grace.” “Oh yes, sir, that is a great blessing.”
“Yes; and often do the Lord’s people get warm when their spirits meet each other at a throne of grace, even though in distant lands. There is a story of a girl who went to the barn before going to bed, and after putting her own case in order before the Lord, some one of His people came across her mind, and she must needs pray a word for him. After this another came, and then another and another, until at length the sun beamed in through the barn, which, when she discerned, and the Lord’s people still continuing to crowd in upon her mind, she said, ‘Ah me! when at all will ye let me away?'” With a smile, she said, “Sweet jewel!”
“As your friend is coming to bid you finally farewell, I shall leave you, praying the Lord to strengthen you to bear the farewell.”
7th March.—
Found her jaws had locked the previous evening, between six and seven o’clock.
Sabbath, 8th March.—
Jaws still locked; leeches and a blister applied. When the leeches began to draw on Saturday, after I had been there, she fainted, and they were withdrawn.
10th March.—
“How are you to-day, Betsy?” “Weak, sir, but happy.”
“When were your jaws relieved?” “At twelve o’clock on Sabbath night—fifty hours. When the leeches made me faint on Saturday, I thought I was just going away; I was happy at the thought that the time of my release had come.”
“You thought you were stepping into Elisha’s chariot?” “Yes, just that, sir. I joyed to be free, not from suffering, but from sin.”
“Well, what was your staff and stay then?” “Fear thou not, for I am with thee: be not dismayed, for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness”—Isaiah xli. 10. What a full promise that is, sir.”
“Yes, it is one assurance after another.” “Yes, sir; the Lord gives Himself the most endearing names in His promises:—Thy Husband, thy Redeemer, thy Saviour, a Friend that sticketh closer than a brother; but ‘thy God’ is chief of them all. ‘I am thy God’ swallows up all other endearing names in it.”
“How was your mind engaged on Sabbath?” “That Scripture, sir, which I have mentioned, continued with me. I felt happy at the prospect of Jordan, seeing that the Lord was saying to me, ‘For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not, I will help thee’—Isa. xli. 13. I was enabled to say with confidence, ‘Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him’—Job xiii. 15.”
21st March.—
Having been absent from town for some days, I did not see Betsy until to-day.
“How have you been since I saw you, Betsy?” “Much as when you saw me. The Lord continues to be gracious to me, and makes me feel His blessed presence, in His Word supporting and comforting me. The lozenges you gave me have relieved me almost entirely of the cough that troubled me. My mind has this day been more distressed than usual.”
“Wherewith?” “With the state of public affairs in the Church and in the State.”
“What have you to do with earthly affairs, one that appears to be on the threshold of glory?” “Oh, sir, I feel concerned for the Church of God on the earth, and this day the Church of Scotland took particular hold upon my mind.”
“In what respect?” “As to the many enemies with which she is assailed on every side, seeking her destruction.”
“Well, all these enemies she has procured for herself by having departed from her first purity and love, and thereby causing the secession from her pale.” “Yes, sir, that is true; but how woful that it is not her purity they desire, that they might return again to her communion, but her destruction. What a wild spirit that is that is abroad among them. It cannot be the Spirit, for that Spirit would seek purity and not destruction, as He did the Churches of Asia.”
“That I own; but how lamentable it is that she should not take warning, and repent and do her first works, and return to her former purity; then would her first Husband return to her, and would remind her of the days of her espousals, and come to His place, He and the ark of His strength. Then should her priests be clothed with salvation and her people shout forth joyfully. Mark what is said, ‘Return unto me, and I will return unto you, saith the Lord.'” “Oh yes, sir, we are beset with woful circumstances on every side. Our day is a day of great provocation to God. People are set down in a cold heartless form of religion, and are proud-hearted because they have the form of godliness, though the power of godliness be not among them.”
“Yes, the power of God in the ordinances of the Gospel is withheld, which is a sure token that God is wroth with our generation and with our Churches.” “Yes, sir, that is indeed a sure token of God being angry with us and with our Churches, for we do not hear of any special work of revival anywhere but that on a small scale, which you had been telling me the other day.”
“True, indeed; but if the Church were to return unto the Lord, with weeping and mourning for her defection, and renew her covenant engagement with the Lord, then would He, as a covenant-keeping God, be glorious in the midst of her; and His work would appear in her as in the days of Asa—2 Chron. xv. 9. He would then thin the ranks of her enemies, and God would preserve her and His name in the midst of her.” “Oh, sir, I hope the Lord will preserve her and stand by her to defend her, and that he shall bring about a work of reformation in her yet.”
“May the Lord grant it, and plead His own cause in our land, for we are brought very low.”
I took occasion to tell her the outlines of the work of God at the Kirk of Shots on the Monday of a Communion, in commemoration of which Monday is since kept in the Church of Scotland. With a cheerful smile, she said, “Oh, sir, is it? I never knew that.”
I told her of the extraordinary Communion in Cambuslang in August 1774, and of the work of reformation in the hands of Mr. Grimshaw in the North of England, and several other instances. “Oh, sir, what tidings you have given me; you have removed a heavy load from my mind.”
“Yes, Betsy, these were glorious days in Scotland in times that are past; and when you go to your Father’s kingdom you will find there as many from Scotland, in proportion to its extent and population, as from any kingdom that ever was on the earth.” “Yes,” said she, “blessed be the Lord.”
(To be Continued.)