(Continued from page 269.)
IT pleased God, at this time, to reveal a very dark providence by His word and Spirit: it brought me into a great strait, from those considerations; I was afraid that I was meddling with things too high for me; but I stood in awe of those words, “I will destroy them, and not build them up, who observe not the operations of my hands.” On the other hand, I was afraid of quenching the Spirit, and so would have provoked the Lord to withdraw. I saw much need of divine wisdom to guide in the middle path of judgment: I found one party in my soul that was for carnal ease, and let the matter happen as it would; I found another party in my soul that said, “That is not the way to glorify God; ‘Abraham was strong in faith, giving glory to God.'” It was matter of many errands to the throne of grace, and the Lord was graciously pleased to give new confirmation from His word: and He said, “Will I hide from Abraham that which I have a mind to do?” But, alas! I could not believe there were so many opposites in the way of the accomplishment of the promise.
At this time I was visited by a minister, and I thought I would ask his mind concerning the matter. He made his visit short, and went about prayer, and in prayer he had these words, “Lord, Thou in Thy adorable sovereignty hast been pleased to reveal the secrets of Thy covenant to every believer; but to some believers, Thou art pleased to reveal the secrets of Thy providence.” This was very refreshing to me. When it pleased the Lord to bring the matter to pass, I got a glorious manifestation of the glory of His truth, and also of His wisdom shining in the accomplishment of it, and His wonderful condescendency. And these words afforded me sweet ground of meditation, “The works of righteousness are peace; and the effect of righteousness, quietness and assurance for ever” (Isaiah xxxii. 17).
Another very remarkable act of God’s kindness to me, and to the land also, so far as I can remember, was in the year 1760. We were suddenly alarmed that the French forces were landed, or near to land. I was often afraid, when I considered my own sin, and the sins of the land, that the Lord, in His righteous judgment, would make these wicked men the rod in His hand to punish us for our iniquities. When I considered our breach of solemn covenants, and the despising of glorious Christ, in the offers of the gospel, and also the profaning of His name by false swearing and the profaning of His holy day, together with the awful divisions amongst the godly; for these, and many other evils, I was truly afraid, that the Lord would tear and go away. I often thought, “Oh! shall we be the unhappy generation that will sin the Lord away from Scotland, where He has had His possession for so long a time?”
Some reckon our Lord was not above fifteen years ascended, when He sent the glorious gospel to Scotland by means of persecution. We are also told that Donald, a Christian king, established Christianity by law in the year of our Lord, 203, and broke down the bulwarks of Paganism. Our Lord hath likewise taken infestment of Scotland six times by solemn national covenant: and He hath had martyrs in Scotland, asserting His kingly office and royal prerogatives at the expense of their blood. But, alas! what matter of lamentation is it, that our Lord is so robbed of His royal prerogatives in Scotland, whose prerogative it is to set watchmen upon Zion’s walls; and this power put into the hands of profane lords and lairds, and the poor people robbed of their right of choosing their own pastors! It is also for matter of lamentation that so many are strengthening the hands of intruders and hirelings that have entered the house of God. Instead of testifying against them, few are valiant for the truth upon the earth. “Shall I not visit for these things? saith the Lord: shall not my soul be avenged on such a nation as this?” (Jer. ix. 9).
I remember, about eight years ago, we were threatened with a bloody sword. I was much afraid the Lord would send the sword to Scotland to avenge the quarrel of His broken covenant. The Lord was pleased to give me that view, that He would avert the stroke for some time, from Proverbs vi. 10, “Yet a little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to sleep.” Oh! I am afraid all our deliverances are as a sleep-drink; for we have not returned to give glory to God, before He cause darkness. I am afraid that there is an awakening abiding Scotland that will arouse her out of her security. I think the Lord is saying concerning her, as it is in Amos ix. 9, “I will sift her as corn is sifted in a sieve.” “I will bring the third part through the fire,” and “I will leave in her a poor and an afflicted people, and they shall trust in the name of the Lord” (Zeph. iii. 12). At this time, however, when I heard the French were near to land, the Lord bore in these words with life and power, “I will put a hook in his nose, and a bridle in his lips, and turn him back by the way which he came” (Isaiah xxxvii. 29). “Thou shalt not see a people of a deeper speech than thou canst understand” (Isaiah xxxiii. 19). “Thou shalt come to thy grave in peace, and thine eyes shall not see all the evil that I will bring upon this place” (2 Kings xxii. 20). From these words I got a view that the Lord would avert the judgment at this time also, and that I would never see the French, nor ever suffer harm by them. Then I was made to plead with the Lord, that He Himself would turn back our enemies in the way, that instruments might not rob Him of His glory. And I was informed the wind was the instrument the Lord made use of to turn back our enemies at this time. O but our Lord is kind to prisoners! I never got so far above the fear of His judgments, as at this time, when I could do nothing for myself; neither had I dependence on any other, but the Lord. I enjoyed a sweet composure of spirit, when the shot of a gun or the beating of a drum would have set others a-trembling about me.
These occurrences of providence induced me to make the three following reflections.
1. The reason why we were so much afraid of man, was because we feared God so little; for had we stood more in awe of God, we would have been less afraid of man: “The fear of man causeth a snare.”
2. I saw that a presumptuous faith had much need of fair weather; for I saw that it left these who had it in a storm, when they had most need of it.
3. I saw that the Lord was much displeased with us for the sin of ingratitude to Him, from these words: “Were there not ten cleansed? but where are the nine?” Only one returned to give Him the glory.
Another very remarkable act of the Lord’s lovingkindness and free love vouchsafed to me, was on a Communion Saturday, when the family were gone to the ordinance. I was like to be overcome with sorrow; but I may say to the praise of the Lord, in all my straits, I have been revived by this His word alone. He brought to my mind, with a very fresh sense of His love, 1 Cor. iii. 23, “All things are yours, and ye are Christ’s and Christ is God’s.” “And what can David say more?” (2 Samuel viii. 20). I thought I might render it thus, “What can David have more?” or what could I have more than a God in Christ, and all things with Him? It passeth the tongue of men or angels to speak of these “all things” that believers have: or though one were to write a large volume of them, they might say on the matter, as the queen of Sheba said of the wisdom of Solomon, the half of it hath not been told. They are a field that will serve believers to travel in to eternity, and find no end of their treasures.
I shall enumerate a few of these “all things” which I saw at this time. I saw the love of God to be mine from all eternity, for He saith, “You hath He chosen in Christ Jesus before the world was.” I saw His love to be mine to eternity, for “He rests in His love.” Also I saw “justice satisfied” in the Son of God, and love getting an honourable vent through Him. I saw Him to be the “true tabernacle” where God and man meeteth together. I saw Him to be “God’s way to us,” and “our way to God;” and the ravishing glory of God, that shined in the face of our Lord Jesus, filled my soul with wonder. I think the Lord allowed me as large a feast all the three days of that solemnity as ever I enjoyed at a Communion. I seldom longed to be at the ordinances, but I was reproved by these, or some other words: “Have I been unto thee a barren wilderness or a land of darkness? or lacked ye any thing?” To which my soul was made to reply, “Truth, Lord, I have lacked nothing: I have been at no loss by the want of ordinances.” I do not mention this to discourage any one from attending on the ordinances of God’s appointment: for “He delighteth more in the gates of Zion, than in all the dwellings of Jacob.” I only notice it, to shew how kind the Lord hath been to a poor unworthy prisoner, who am less than the least of His mercies.
One night I had a very sudden shock of trouble: in the meantime three young men came in providentially; I desired them to go about duty. One of them sung in the lxxiii. Psalm, from the 24th verse; by which the Lord brought to my mind what I once enjoyed at a Communion, where I got a very humbling sight of the love of God, and the enmity of my own heart, which I think is the most humbling sight ever I saw; such a sight is more heart-melting and humbling than although one would live many years at Mount Sinai. I was much afraid of sin, because of a wicked heart within and a tempting devil and an ensnaring world without. While I was thus perplexed, O how sweetly did the Lord bear in those words with light and joy! Psalm xlviii. 14, That ye may tell it to the generations following: “For this God is our God for ever and ever; he will be our guide even unto death.” I saw such a fulness in these words as made me say, “O the remedy is as broad as the sore.” I saw all in them that I needed in time and for eternity. In this night of distress the Lord brought them back to my mind, with a bright display of His faithfulness and sweet sense of His love; upon which I thought I could have ventured into eternity, depending upon His word.
But before the last of the three young men had gone about duty, the accuser of the brethren, that sometimes accuseth man to God, and God to man, did accuse God to me, saying, in these words, “When ye may make many prayers, He will not hear you.” This set me upon examination in the sight of God and my own conscience, who were witnesses, first, as to the motives that induced me to the duty of prayer and praise. I was clear that it was the call of God that induced me to it, Psalm l. 15, “In the day of great trouble see that thou call upon me.” This being a time of great trouble, I thought it proper to employ others to join with me, both in praying to God and in praising of Him. Secondly, I was made to examine upon what grounds I desired we should be heard or accepted. My conscience bore me witness that it was the doing and dying of our Lord Jesus Christ, that was the only ground. It is the sweet-smelling sacrifice of our slain Lord that perfumes our persons and duties before God, and makes them ascend with acceptance before His throne.
Satan also suggested that my sins would rise with me in judgment, and that he would pursue me before the judgment-seat. This filled me with great fear, and the Lord withdrew the sweet sense of His love. I resolved, however, to cast myself over upon Him; and if I perished I would perish at Christ’s feet, where never one perished. I waited with great fear to hear my sentence come from Himself. I thought nothing but a word from His blessed lips, who speaketh as never man spake, would satisfy me. O the astonishing condescendency of God to one of the vilest of sinners! O how sweetly did the Lord bear in those words, Isaiah liv. 17, “Every tongue that riseth against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn: This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord; and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord;” with Jer. i. 20, “In that day the iniquities of Israel shall be sought for, and there shall be none; and the sins of Judah, but they shall not be found.” Those words were sweeter to my taste than the honey-comb.
(To be continued.)