FLATTERY leads one to suppose that we cherish in regard to him a better opinion than we do in point of fact. It consists in praising him to his face beyond our estimate of his merits. It puts soft words in his ear. Its motive is generally sinister and selfish. It is a wilful deception. The book of God refers to it as a vice. “A man that flattereth his neighbour spreadeth a net for his feet.” “A flattering mouth worketh ruin.” “Therefore meddle not with him who flattereth with his lips.”
As a general fact, we believe that a mind weak enough to desire flattery, will be found both weak and bad enough to be injured by it. True, there are circumstances in which it is highly proper to express to our neighbour our favourable opinion. Sometimes he needs it for the support and encouragement of his heart. It may also be the artless tribute of genuine affection. But there are no cases in which we are justified in the sin of flattery. It is always a contemptible falsehood, justly odious in the eyes of all sensible people. It is no mark of sense, and no proof of friendship. Those who practise it, are quite likely to backbite on one side and flatter on the other. It is, moreover, an exceedingly nauseous vice, requiring on the part of the flattered very strong nerves, or a great amount of folly to relish it.
Even the civilities of courtesy may be carried so far as to make them really offensive—a species of acted flattery. This is not common; yet it is the fault of some persons. They are in perfect raptures when they see you, and, judging from external manifestations, sad when you leave them. On the outside they have more kindness than one knows what to do with. Supposing this necessary to politeness, they woefully overact the matter; they act out ten times as much feeling as they really possess. Judge not of their real views or feelings towards you by this excessive parade; for bear in mind that no small part of it is nothing but parade. It is hollow. Rap on it for any practical purpose, and it will be found to be so. It is either an educated misfortune, or a vicious foolery—never a genuine politeness. If one does not wish to see another, he will do the latter a favour not to “die of a rose in aromatic pain;” and if he does wish to see him, then nature’s simple and unsophisticated expression of the fact will be abundantly sufficient. Anything that goes beyond this is useless, and generally deceptive.—Evangelist.