Letter by Miss RUTH BRYAN.*
HIGH Pavement, April 21, 1856.—My Beloved Friend, I have been much longing to respond to your last welcome and cheering note. I do indeed rejoice that you had such a comfortable visit from the Lord’s dear servant, Mr. D—, and trust it was a lasting lift from the Lord Himself, and that you may not again sink so low as you did before, nor give place to unbelief and Satan, for these giant foes will raise questionings about the brightest manifestations and sweetest enjoyments. May the Lord rebuke them, and enable you to go forward trusting in Him, who will shew you greater things than these. I admire the Lord’s work in the sweet effects you mention of being afraid to act to free yourself from trial, while you are kept waiting upon the Lord to see Him work and go before you in all things. This is very blessed and safe. One has well said, When we follow the Lord and keep His company, He always bears our expenses; if we run before Him or go alone, He may leave us to bear our own. The Lord may lead us round, but He will lead us right. Oh! may you, my dear friend, be kept in a waiting frame of spirit; it is most blessed, though very contrary to our flesh; and you know our time here is so short that if things of an outward kind be ever so disagreeable, it will soon, very soon, be over, and all that now annoys our flesh will, in the light of eternity appear a very nothing. This thought reminds me of a dear young friend, who has only been married three or four years, but in that time has had a sea of tribulation to wade through. But the Lord has sanctified the sorrow and drawn her to Himself; and most moving it is to see her humbled, softened spirit—I mean spiritually softened, for she is naturally kind and amiable—and to hear her say she feels every step has been permitted, for if her path had been smooth, she might have rested in outward comforts, but now the world looks nothing to her, and things she once enjoyed have no charm. In speaking of probable future trial she said: “Oh, we have such a short stay here, it seems comparatively of little importance in what outward circumstances we are, so that the soul is right.” This is a true testimony from a young disciple in deep trial. Oh! may we live in the spirit of it, and our daily cry be, “Lord, lift Thou up the light of Thy countenance upon me.” In company with Jesus, the heaviest trials are borne as amongst covenant blessings, even the sure mercies of David.
We call ourselves “pilgrims and strangers,” but surely if we are quite satisfied with being so, we should not be so disconcerted by the annoyances of the road and of the inn—for what is any place here but an inn—just a lodging-place for a little season till our Father sends for us home. If our fellow-travellers are unkind, unreasonable, or aught beside, yet we shall soon part, and perhaps after all we may find how much self-love has been prevailing in us, and how often we are murmuring about the mote in their eye and neglecting the beam in our own. Oh! my loved one, may the Lord give us a meek, quiet, and patient spirit, which is, in the sight of God, of great price, though very contrary to our flesh. That has been a striking word to me, “We count them happy which endure.” That word “endure” is worthy to be written in letters of gold. May the blessed Spirit set it in our hearts, and set our hearts steadfastly unto it in all the real or imaginary ills of life. To endure for Christ’s sake breaks much of their force. Well, dear friend, we are both in the furnace; much, very much dross has in my case risen up, but my blessed and patient Refiner sits watching the process,—nor does all this, hateful as it is, make Him forsake the work of His hands. He will have me know a little of what is in my heart, that I may know more of what is in His, even love, most invincible, unalterable, unquenchable love; love that endures to the end amidst all sorts of evil, and wandering, and ingratitude. It is indeed marvellous; and into the blessed depths of this love I desire to be daily sinking in all the fresh discoveries of my utter worthlessness and vileness, that thus I may praise Him more who has redeemed me from it all. The Lord, you know, does not show us how bad we are to cause despair, but to shew forth the riches of His grace in saving us, and to call forth new songs of praise to Him who loved us, and washed us from our sins in His own blood.
Oh, my dear friend, Jesus is worthy to be praised in the depths as well as in the heights. He is near, and dear, and precious in the hour of affliction, and in the path of tribulation, where He gives some of His choicest fruits and wines to revive those who are faint and weary in the wilderness. I am most thankful He gave you such a seasonable refreshment; and, like Manoah, you will be saying, “O my Lord, let the man of God whom thou didst send come again to us.” But I mean especially the Lord Himself, for it was His visitation that refreshed your spirit, and He sent His servant where He Himself meant to come. Where He has been once He is sure to come again. “I will see you again, and your heart shall rejoice.” Meanwhile it will be your mercy to be seeking for that excellent life of faith which is so strengthening to the soul, so glorifying to the Lord. Oh! may you be helped, yea enabled, “to trust in the Lord at all times”; not when you feel His love and have the shine of His countenance, but also in the dark and wintry day when clouds veil your sky, and sorrow invades your soul. “What time I am afraid I will trust in Thee.”—With kindest love and best wishes, I remain yours in Jesus, most affectionately, RUTH.
* She lived in Nottingham and died there on 27th July, 1860.