TO MRS. AULD.
Bower, 20th July, 1865.
My Dear Friend,—I have been much hindered, through many temptations, from writing to you. When in our difficulties we consult only with our own wisdom, no wonder that every small straw stumbles us. No poor sinner’s standing is in himself; we must be kept near the Good Shepherd, who laid down His life for the sheep. When we lose sight of Him, we wander in a wilderness where there is no way.
You were lately at the Communion at Thurso. I was not able to go. I hope you got the hunger that the poor woman got, who did not think she was ill-named when she was compared to a dog. O! to be brought to this low ground; then Christ would be precious to us.
I am thinking of going to Watten sacrament, if permitted. I am like a poor man I remember to see when I was a child. He used to beg, and people were harsh to him for this, saying he had plenty of the world, and had no need to beg. Now the poor man was the worse of having the name of riches, when he had them not. I am like that poor man, carrying the name of a Christian before the eyes of the world; and oh, it is sad to want the spirit of Christianity, and to be carrying a hard and stony heart, a carnal mind, and a dumb and prayerless spirit. You will find my case truly in Psalm cii. verse 11.
My Dear Friend, pray that I may get drops out of the river of life, for I am like a poor prodigal, who has misspent all. As one of the godly fathers said, “When the Lord is pleased to give us some refreshing, we soon sin it away, and then we may as easily put our hand on the sun in the firmament as bring ourselves back to that frame of soul.” Yet, if we could ask, we would receive, according to His promise, who hath said, “He will turn again,” etc.—Yours, with much regard, David Steven.