LETTER TO THE REV. MR. HUNTINGTON.
Dear Sir,
In reading your last favour I am much struck with the propriety of its contents. I am happy that God inclines you to reprove in me what you see inconsistent with His will. Nor will you wonder at the instrument in my apartment, when I assure you that music has been my predominant charm. There has been a time when (to my shame I write it) I have sat four hours in a day at a harpsichord; nor was it in the power of any person living to draw me from it. However, Sir, this I can now say, from my own conscience that, since it has pleased God to make me feel his wrath, and the vileness of my corrupt heart, I am thoroughly weaned from my vanity, as well as from many others. My heart is, indeed and of a truth, thoroughly sick of all these vain enchantments. God is witness, that I desire more and more to be pressing forward toward the mark for the prize of our high calling; that I sincerely crave to forsake all these things, to take up my cross, and to follow Christ.
If you did but know my present state, and feel the real distress of mind, I now labour under, with the horrors of an embittered conscience, which I almost continually feel, too powerfully to be expressed, you would not suppose that I have the least delight in amusing myself with a “rattle of the devils.” I find time too precious to employ it in this unprofitable manner. I feel my heart and conscience too deeply impressed with matters of greater importance, than to take any delight in a musical instrument.
I see you still doubt of my sincerity; but God knoweth it and knows also the truth of what I am penning. Indeed, had I seen the same, I should have been very apt to have judged of the matter as you have done. But, believe me, this instrument was not brought to this house on my account. Here I found it; and it was by the desire of a friend that I played upon it. God knows that my heart was by no means inclined to it, for I am convinced this is not glorifying God; quite the reverse; and for that alone do I desire life. However, I’ll tell you the effect your letter has had on this subject. God crowns with divine power every advice you give me. I have read attentively the third of Daniel, and the sixth of Amos; and find that your work of conscience (in this respect) and mine tally so exactly, that I am going tomorrow to order the immediate removal of this “rattle of the devils!”)
… Shall be glad of your answer to this when convenient; and so conclude in humble acknowledgment of your just reproofs, faithful dealings, and tender care, your obedient, dutiful, and affectionate daughter.
ELIZABETH MORTON.
Miss Morton later writes to Mr. Huntington relating the Lord’s merciful dealings towards her, part of which is as follows:—
“I have to acknowledge that God’s grace has been sufficient for me, though I could not expect it. Blessed be His name, His promise in His Word stands fast for the relief and comfort of distressed souls in a trying hour. I have felt, by blessed experience, God’s Almighty arm supporting me, when health and strength have both failed me, on account of my unhappy state of mind; when I have been doubting, fearing, dejected, nay, almost despairing. I have had powerfully impressed on me—the Lord will never suffer his faithfulness to fail, and that He is more willing to hear than we are to pray; for, “whatsoever,” says Christ, “ye ask in my name, believing, ye shall receive it.” Oh for faith to build our hopes, more and more, on His faithful word of promise, which stands firmer than the pillars of the earth.
When I reflect on the various scenes of my past life, I bless God with my whole heart that ever I was afflicted. I pray that I may never murmur, but rather bless our heavenly Father for every dispensation of His providence towards me. Do you never find that sanctified trials are blessings in disguise; and that God often hides a smiling countenance under dark and frowning providences? I have been often struck with this.
But to my present case: What have I to say? First, I sincerely feel myself the vilest of sinners—I grieve at the great depravity of my corrupt nature, that I was so easily seduced to believe those doctrines of devils that God has pronounced an eternal curse upon. This sin is ever before me. At the same time, my heart glows with love and gratitude to God for having granted me so great and wonderful a deliverance; for having preserved me, while hundreds are daily cut off in their sins and errors. Surely he has manifested covenant love towards me; for I can truly say, that my soul thirsteth after righteousness, and that my heart delighteth in no other than a God reconciled in Christ. I find by heartfelt experience, that I die daily to the trash of this present evil world. “Bless the Lord, O my soul! and all that is within me bless His holy name.”
ELIZABETH MORTON.